Oh, the ongoing fun that is the relationship of Volkswagen’s Sébastien Ogier (FRA) and German (sports) television presenter Andrea Kaiser. Though it is none of our business (or, yours), refraining from wondering if the (almost disgustingly) adorable couple was engaged, or had even (in fact) gotten married at some point, was all-but impossible as the changing weights and shininess of the ring fingers of the pair toyed with the detail-oriented eyes of the public. More challenging was trying to figure out how to translate a devolving look of uncertainty while (verbally) stumbling through concoctions of various possible relationship statuses into written words. Think: Ogier’s…uh…wifegirlfriendfiancéesignificantothertypething???…whatever…I don’t know…Andrea??? (with a grimace of painful confusion and eyebrow activity challenging that of Cap’n Crunch’s, head turning and tilting through it all).
Ring. No ring. Ring. No ring.
Yes, in case anyone missed the memo (ask us how hard it was to refrain from breaking our break with this broken news, and we will tell you: given our love of Gogiera, more difficult than it should have been), Ogier followed his undeniably rewarding second-place finish to the brutal Volkswagen battle that was Rally Finland 2014 with what appeared to be a very quiet ceremony, making his head and heart marriage to Kaiser official in the eyes of the law. A gorgeous waterfront non-event, with a sunset backdrop to signify the end of one era and the beginning of a new one, all crammed into their busy sporting schedules. Beauty and brains. How is that for a perfect marriage German efficiency and French romanticism?
Congratulations, French Toast and Kaiser Roll.
(Clearly, we think you are a pretty delicious pair.)